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Thursday, August 18, 2011

Heart Melting Moments.

We've been working on teaching gender to Harri in his therapy sessions recently. And I can't say it's been going well. Like colour, he really struggles with the concept. Of course there is nothing unusual about these things from a kid on the spectrum, but like most other ASD children occasionally he will get it right, and you think, where did that come from?

Yesterday was one such time. We arrived at my daughters school to collect her at the end of the day, when Harri spotted a couple of rambunctious 3 year olds having a play fight nearby. He was instantly captivated and couldn't wiggle out of his car seat fast enough in order to run over to them. As most parents reading this blog, particularly those with social types, will know, it is with some apprehension that we watch our children approach others. We know they are motivated to engage with kids, and we take that as a positive, yet we also know there are rules of social engagement to follow that our child wont relate to, and may find themselves being rejected in the course of clumsily attempting to join in. So I watch, and catch myself holding my breath as I wait to see what unfolds. Then I am left open mouthed and filled with pride, as he runs over and I hear him say "hi boys".

Only the parent of a child with ASD will fully comprehend the multilayers of social success in this seemingly simple scenario and those two small words. I was overwhelmed with surprise, relief and wonder. How did he know they were boys? Why did he even think it important enough to mention their gender when approaching? It flowed so naturally, not stilted or forced, and in that moment he looked like a normal, enthusiastic little kid. So much so that all three children went running off together in a game of haphazard chasey, and they readily accepted him into their games for the next few minutes while we waited for the school siren. He was playing, and he was happy. He was one of the boys.


  1. That's beautiful - I wonder if you got teary as I just did? :)

    Every small step is a giant leap.. xx

  2. Thanks everyone. Teary? u bet. Iv'e got to write a post on PMT and raising an ASD kid. Whoohhee!!

  3. What a great story! Thank you for doing it for all of us! I call those moments:"the glimpses of the future". My darling ASD son - 6, had his first ever haircut by a hairdresser another day- and I called and told all of my friends about it!And yes- I cried off happy tear or two ....
    Thank you Sharon.

  4. That's really beautiful.

  5. Thanks again.
    And good for your little guy anon.

  6. aw! this is really a heart melting moment! keep it up Sharon!

  7. That's a beautiful moment! And, yeah, I guess it might be hard for someone who hasn't watched such a scene (perhaps with different results) to truly appreciate it.

  8. Hi Stephanie, and thanks. There have been different outcomes previously. Not so nice.